Jenna Marbles on YouTube

Posted on May 1st, 2012 by craighope

Jenna Marbles YouTube 'er. Funny, sexy.

Jenna, I stumbled across your YouTube Channel.  I find you quite funny.  I also see that you are quite sexy.

I feel the need to point out that you don’t have tats all over (Kudos!).  It is refreshing to see a normal person.  Do you workout?

You are creative and adequately self deprecating.

Keep up the fun work and I hope you are doing well.

YouTube Channel – http://www.youtube.com/user/JennaMarbles

Blog – http://jennamarblesblog.com – The blog isn’t as entertaining as the YouTube channel.  What some vids.

Here is a nice video example…

Amazon recommendations

Posted on February 6th, 2012 by craighope

From time to time see the section of a product listed “People who bought this, also bought this…”.  Most of the time, it is logical.  Sometimes you have to fill in the blanks.

The chocolate covered strawberries, that makes sense.  Followed by the gift basket, ok.. got it.

Then the sexy lingerie… giddy up.  Got it.

But the paper towels?

Amazon Recommendations

1000 words

Posted on January 4th, 2012 by craighope

I really avoid engaging in this type of political trash talk, but over the past few years this sentiment has been shared.

You win

You are not a model…

Posted on November 22nd, 2011 by craighope

Social media and the random successes from YouTube might be the ruination of this great country… or Planet.  Kim Kardashian is the exception.  You will never be like Kim.

Anyone can post anything to their photos or upload a video and call themselves a model.  Any dooshy guy can tell you nice things.  Don’t fall prey to it.  When one wades through the self-aggrandizing posts and pics its easy to spot an insecure soul.  It’s sad.  Way too many wedding photos too.  If you celebrate your 5 yr anniversary, time to stop featuring the bride pic as your FB photo.

Here are some tells why you are not a model.

1. When you work at Hooters and corporate stops by to take some photographs.

2. If you dated, slept, offered any sexual favor to the guy holding the camera.

3. Your creepy but creatively talented teen neighbor asks you to be an extra in his soft core Star Wars parody YouTube video.

4.  Daniel Tosh put your wedding video on the air.  Note: he’s not laughing with you.

5.  Bleached hair and Big boobs not a model make.  Anyone can invest $8000 into 34-D’s.  Try fixing that snaggletooth smile of yours.

Camo Lingerie?

Posted on November 10th, 2011 by craighope

Git er done!

Bass Pro Christmas catalog just arrived.  As I thumb through it I find the “intimate apparel” of which is all camo.  I don’t get it, but it shows up from time to time in these catalogs so someone is buying it.

But Really?  Who buys this crap?  The ladies are definitely attractive and worthy of the modeling work that the catalog calls for.  I would recommend they hire new management.  You can find good work with a natural C and D cup.

Top 5 reasons to wear Camo skivvies…

5. To hide from the rapey hill people when camping.

4. when you can’t wear white under your camo wedding dress.

3. Ted Nugent is coming in concert and you have back stage passes.

2. You’ve got a strip-o-gram gig in the green zone.

1. …you married Larry the Cable Guy and its the only thing that triggers his Cialis.

Google Maps Streetview Naked lady

Posted on September 10th, 2011 by craighope

There is so much to point out about this image.

Aside from being naked and and drinking something from a gallon milk jug, look at all the crap littered about.

From the looks of the bicycles in disrepair, this might be the missing black sister from the Brady Bunch.

There is a red shopping cart with what might be her laundry?

The bottom of the pic you see a cute dog (mutt?).

Above all else, she recycles.  There are enough bins to cover all materials.

Isn’t that special?

Posted on September 8th, 2011 by craighope

I sometimes get confused.

Yearbook Reply “Sheepskins”

Posted on July 27th, 2011 by craighope

The reply below is to a teacher.  Mrs. Fodrell.  You may remember her as Ms. Leslie.  We all found her fair and nice, and most of all a hottie.  I later had her for freshman english (or remedial something related to language arts).

A bit of history to this…  Brent Stockstill and I used to poke fun at Lisa Bolen for wearing these strange boots that we referred to as “sheepskins”.  They were the precusor to the Ugg boots but with a shorter ankle that resembled something worn in a Robin Hood stage play.  What can I say, we were 13 and cruel.  I apologize.  In my defense, we were not malicious and it was never anything more than 7th grade hazing.  If I recall, Lisa enjoyed the attention and as best I can remember she never cried.

Dear Mrs Fodrell, I apologize for your lack of understanding concerning the “sheepskins”.  You have much better fashion sense than a silly 7th grade girl.  Your flipped up collars and brunette bangs were smokin’.  You should have been on Dynasty.  I digress…

Just to clear things up, “sheepskins” did not refer to condoms.  They were crappy looking boots.

Yearbook reply “Flashback 84″

Posted on July 27th, 2011 by craighope

This is my first installment of many replies to my friends who wrote stuff in my yearbooks.

This one comes from 1984 at the end of 7th grade.

Note: Greg and Jay wrote the same thing.

Dear Greg Wood and Jay Curley,

Thanks, but my summer wasn’t  like toilet paper.  Instead it was short and not at all useful.